“What is that you think, that you wanted to teach me but did not succeed, Baba?”
My son asked me in our call yesterday, while I was sharing with him my staple dose of what to expect from life and how to deal with the professional challenges once he comes out of college next year.
It’s a question, probably the easiest to answer in a normal conversation.
In fact it was the same list that I was sharing seconds before he put me off guard, by asking the question point blank.
I replied, “Mainly two things –
Firstly, you chose your options, but once chosen you follow it through.
And the second, Value whatever you got in life. Whether it’s your clothes, shoes, the food on the table to your cell phone and laptop.”.
I continued, “Look, lot of things people learn with age and experience, that you would also learn on your way.
Therefore, I don’t want to complicate your life with a list of expectations.
But these two are fundamental traits, that if one does not learn by 9 cannot learn in 90”.
He picked up the thread, “I understand choosing my option and follow it through is important. But what makes me worried is, working in a job for 9 hours a day 5 days a week, confined in a desk. How would I be able to cope up with that?”.
Valid question !!!!!!
As usual I have got a first hand experience to counter the question.
I replied, “Do you think, after choosing to become an entrepreneur at 45, when I failed spectacularly, it was easy for me to go back to job again, that too with 6 years of service break, swallowing my pride?”
He knew it too well. He shook his head.
I carried on, “See, to be successful one has to outgrow his likes and dislikes. He must do, what he needs to do and not what he wants to do.
What helped me two things –
1. Firstly, getting back to job was a strategic decision, which was the means to the end, and not the end.
My job is the vehicle that would take me to my destination.
So, my likes or dislikes don’t matter. And that’s a mental shift that I had to make, when I decided to go back. Not easy but doable.
2. Secondly my likes or dislikes do not determine my honesty and integrity when it comes to approaching a task.
When I do something, I try to do that the best that anybody could do.
And I derive satisfaction from the outcome.
My cleaning activities usually limited within my possessions.
However, once in a while when I clean the fan or other stuffs at home, I ensure it looks it’s best.
And the focus on the goal takes away my dislikes about the job, and the outcome makes me satisfied.
And the same applies while I am in office. My dislikes don’t matter as long as it takes me to my goal”.
He nodded.
“So, decide a 10 year goal that has a strong emotional connect. And work towards that goal and your problems would disappear.
Challenging But Doable.”.
It seems we both father and son have got a long work cut out for ourselves.